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April 17, 2011

Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 2)

Since known the time in history of humanity, thousands of poets, painters, singers, writers, musicians, craftsmen and sculpturers have been portraying, praising and worshiping the vibrant image of woman and her fertility, elegance, liveliness, charisma and splendor by employing intellect, creativity, imaginations and emotions at their best. Folklore, legends, creation myths and cultures are meaningless and incomplete without her. Kings and emperors have fought wars over her physical beauty and lost their women, lives, kingdoms and empires.

Her unique characteristics, skills and qualities separate her from men. Beauty, cuteness, resilience, resourcefulness, adaptability and naturality can be easily equated to a woman. The entire world is worthless without her warmth, tenderness, affection, empathy, caring nature, managerial qualities and a wide spectrum of the social skills. Also, she is the key driving force of human evolution because her choice in form of a male partner eventually contributes to the gene pool.

Photo credit: Christopher Philip; BodyLanguageProject.com

In comparison to a man, a woman makes her choices more carefully, consciously and with lots of patience. If she's genuinely, voluntarily and seriously interested in a man for a long term, a romantic and a committed relationship, she tries to collect every possible clue, hint or signal from the man of her interest to judge, examine and access his overall character, existing and past relationships with other women, current availability, will of commitment, intellect, occupation, income, confidence, social status, inheritance, personal (and family) history, possessions, resourcefulness, potentials, strengths and weaknesses.

Conventionally, it’s the man who makes first move towards woman as he thinks. It's totally wrong at most of times. Surprisingly, it’s the woman who takes initiatives for drawing his attention and bringing him into game of courtship. By default, men are nonverbally dumb and woman has a wider range of nonverbal signals and clues in her arsenal to encourage him to take the first step. Without exceptional circumstance and conditions, she doesn't want to openly and verbally declare that she's attracted towards a man.

There are more than fifty behavioral patterns, moves, clues, displays and signals that have been systematically observed and documented during women's courtship across many cultures, classes, ethnicity and societies.

This is continued from the previous article - Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 1) Please don't forget to visit same if you haven't.

Following are a few of them, which short and catchy titles, that are very common:

Tricky Toucher: When she finds him as a relation worthy individual, she unconsciously touches very sensitive parts of her body. She touches herself below her throat or simply plays with necklace. She gently touches or caresses her neck by fingers.

She unconsciously brings sensitive parts facing towards him. She fidgets with ear rings or tops, gently moves fingers through her hair or places palm on chick.

Inside skin of forearms (above elbows and below wrist) is very sensitive and has strong significance for expressing desire.

Flattering Flute: Folks freely fall for flattery. It’s a common experience and she utilizes her sweet and soft voice for the same. She tries to pronounce words very softly, slowly and care fully so that he wouldn't get hurt by them.

Also, she deliberately asks him about his family, health condition, fitness routine, current activities, undertakings, social engagements, ambitions, aspirations, adventures and future plans.

Sensitive Submitor: Neck is the most vulnerable part of human body and its tilting conveys one’s submission towards the other, under the influence of either fear or fondness. Woman’s neck has a very aesthetic value in her overall physical appearance.

When she decides to move ahead, she tilts herself at one side so that exposed neck becomes visible to him. She would laugh quietly and look at him while doing so. It’s one of the solid signals from her.

Pinky Proposer: In normal condition, blood flow gravitates towards lower part of body. But when she gets excited or emotionally charged, it starts circulating in upward direction i. e. towards torso and face. Her chicks start turning pink (light red) and stays so for a considerable amount of time. It’s evident on fair skin than darker.

It’s clear biological indication about her soaring sensation. Chicks are very sensitive part of face and has large network of veins under its skin. Many woman brush their chicks pink as part of their makeup.

Intimacy Indicator: Intimate, close to body or come-hither gaze has an enormous appeal. When he looks at or talks with her, she holds gaze downward and looks at her torso, palms, fingers or nails. She might fidgets with objects on her laps.

She hardly makes a (prolong) eye contact with him. She might cross her arms over her chest for soothing impulse and comforting herself. She blinks her eyes steadily, sings softly or smiles.

Gentle Wooer: As compared to man’s strong, weight bearing, punching and wrestling wrist, she has very lean and slender wrist that has great nurturing and therapeutic capabilities. She allows her wrist to swivel, sway or hang loose in front of him.

She makes hand gestures to show gentleness and flexibility of her wrist. She fidgets or plays with wrist watches, bracelets or bangles.

Contact Initiator: First touch is very crucial for forming personal and intimate relationship. To cross interpersonal threshold, one has to touch other to convey the wishes, intentions, desires, urges and motives. Women are more social and touch friendly then men.

According to courtship experts, it's the woman who initiates the first touch in 90% of cases. Touch necessarily should not be firm or grabbing but it’s fleeting and brief as if it happened accidentally.

Hip Honker: Like men putting hands on hips, she does same to look very appealing and challenging. She puts one or both hands on hips and stands facing to wards him. Also, she puts her entire weight on one leg and let other point in the other direction.

She performs cat walk while passing in front of him or walking towards him. She (subtly) sways and gyrates her hips like a belly dancer while doing the same. She flaunts her curves in front of her.

Tantalizing Tosser: We already came to know about appealing power of hair and she takes a great advantage of same. She allows her hair wave freely on her back. She lifts and throws them behind shoulders.

She jerks her neck so that hair would move backward and forward on her torso, bounce over her shoulders or fly in air. Even if she has very short hair, she does it instinctively.

Insecure Enquirer: If she finds her man walking, talking, moving, eating or working with other (young and beautiful) woman, she would feel insecure due to possibility of loosing her man to the lady and express jealously on her face. She would make a pity face and cross arms over her chest.

She would glare at the woman. She would try to draw his attention towards her by making some noise. When the woman is not with him, she would try to know about his relation with the woman she has saw him with.

Stealthy Striker: After considerable interactions and signaling, its time to make an ultimate appeal. She passes by him, stands or sits facing her back to him. She looks at him over her shoulders very briefly and looks forward or continues talking with others. It’s her appeal to him for following her.

Looking over the shoulders at the man of her serious interest is an accurate strike on his already throbbing heart.

Dancing Appealer: When she stands or sits very close to him, she lifts her face upwards and starts looking at his face passionately. She plays with him with her hands or teases him sportingly.

She moves back and forth, tries to grab his attention and (openly) asks him to dance or try some moves with her in a party which they both are attending. She gyrates her hips while dancing with him.

By the way, if a woman shows a great amount of interest in a man with only physical, economical, strategic, political and materialistic (short-term) goals and ambitions in her mind then she would send nonverbal clues to arouse and allure him (sexually) to walk in her trap. Her nonverbal behavior, expressions, displays and signals would be purely attention seeking, targeted, inviting, orchestrated, up close, impatient, seductive, imposing, intimate and revealing.

While observing mentioned nonverbal patterns, please ensure that many of them prevail frequently, together or one-after-another during interactions over a considerable period of time. Otherwise, mere attraction or 'fishing' would be mistaken as courtship.

Related Articles:
1) Man’s Courtship Body Language 2) Primary Attraction 3) Courtship and Dance 4) Woman are body language experts 5) Why we smile? 6) Why we wave hands at others? 7) Importance of Eyes 8) Smell of Love 9) What we seek in partner? 10) Why women apply makeup on face? 11) The ways woman provokes her man to be protective 12) The Look of Love? 13) Couple in trouble?

Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 1)

Since known the time in history of humanity, thousands of poets, painters, singers, writers, musicians, craftsmen and sculpturers have been portraying, praising and worshiping the vibrant image of woman and her fertility, elegance, liveliness, charisma and splendor by employing intellect, creativity, imaginations and emotions at their best. Folklore, legends, creation myths and cultures are meaningless and incomplete without her. Kings and emperors have fought wars over her physical beauty and lost their women, lives, kingdoms and empires.

Her unique characteristics, skills and qualities separate her from men. Beauty, cuteness, resilience, resourcefulness, adaptability and naturality can be easily equated to a woman. The entire world is worthless without her warmth, tenderness, affection, empathy, caring nature, managerial qualities and a wide spectrum of the social skills. Also, she is the key driving force of human evolution because her choice in form of a male partner eventually contributes to the gene pool.

Photo credit: Christopher Philip; BodyLanguageProject.com

In comparison to a man, a woman makes her choices more carefully, consciously and with lots of patience. If she's genuinely, voluntarily and seriously interested in a man for a long term, a romantic and a committed relationship, she tries to collect every possible clue, hint or signal from the man of her interest to judge, examine and access his overall character, existing and past relationships with other women, current availability, will of commitment, intellect, occupation, income, confidence, social status, inheritance, personal (and family) history, possessions, resourcefulness, potentials, strengths and weaknesses.

Conventionally, it’s the man who makes first move towards woman as he thinks. It's totally wrong at most of times. Surprisingly, it’s the woman who takes initiatives for drawing his attention and bringing him into game of courtship. By default, men are nonverbally dumb and woman has a wider range of nonverbal signals and clues in her arsenal to encourage him to take the first step. Without exceptional circumstance and conditions, she doesn't want to openly and verbally declare that she's attracted towards a man.

There are more than fifty behavioral patterns, moves, clues, displays and signals that have been systematically observed and documented during women's courtship many cultures, classes, ethnicity and societies.

Following re a few of them, which short and catchy titles, that are very common:

Room Scanner: This is very primitive signal woman gives out on finding an attractive man. She doesn't look directly at him but she rolls her eyes as if running her vision across the room or hall he is present in. Her enlarged angle of vision allows her to do so. She can observe somebody without being noticed by others.

On the other hand, man’s contracted or small 'archer' angle of peripheral vision compels him to look directly at somebody or something.

Advancing Eve: Like man points his leg(s) at woman he finds more attractive or appealing, she points by her leg(s) towards the man she wants to move towards. Even if the man is not looking at her feet directly, his narrow peripheral vision might pick this move.

If she is in a seating position, she puts one leg on another which points at him. She wouldn't keep both of her legs tightly clasped with each other.

Sideway Glancer: When she’s standing or seating in front of, near or next to him; she doesn't look directly at him but along side. When he finds her watching him, she immediately diverts gaze in the other direction as if she didn’t watch him at all.

She repeats the side way glancing until he pays attention at her. Side way glace is one of the great solicitations that he can’t resist.

Giggling Gossiper: If she’s standing or seating nearby, next or in front of him then she tries to make herself heard by him. If she’s having her friends or familiar persons around, she brings up any topic and strikes conversion with them for no obvious reasons.

She makes strange and vivacious facials expressions and pronounces words crisply and with high pitch. She makes a lot of hand gestures, illustrations and vocal modulations. She giggles a lot and looks at him and away repeatedly.

Signalling Senorita: If he’s standing, sitting or walking in front of her, she waves palms at him subtly or overtly to draw his attention. Also, she suddenly starts gesturing with her palms that are kept facing at him.

When he looks at her purposefully or accidentally, she would suddenly stop waving and touches her face, hair and clothes as if she didn't attracted his attention at all.

Graceful Groomer: She tries to look and act attractive i. e. good looking while he is in front of her or around. When he looks at her purposefully or accidentally, she checks her hair, outfits, purse and accessories.

If they are messed up, untidy or wrinkled, she touches and grooms them very gently and dramatically. Grooming takes place irrespective of what she is wearing at the moment i. e. ethnic, modern, formal or casual costumes.

Shy Smiler: A smile has immense power to help in winning somebody’s favor and building a strong rapport instantaneously. When girl gets really attracted to a man, she shows it off by a coy (shy) smile.

Mostly, only her upper teeth are exposed with a slightly elongated gaze at him. Coy smile is hard to mimic and it is a sure sign of her genuine interest in him. Coy smile is a sign of innocence.

Hairy Fairy: Hair are health and fertility indicators. Long, wavy and shining hair have amazing power to win a man’s attention. She would untie her hair and let them free. smoothly touches and runs her fingers though hair to straighten them up.

She gently moves them away from her face and eyes while confronting with him. She will repetitively entwine and release her fingers or play with their ends to show how silky and soft hair are.

Smile Suppressor: Mostly, it’s the woman who smiles a lot during the courtship. Not just the physical beauty and appearance but liveliness, funny side, exuberance and lightheartedness bring a great advantage for her. However, she tries to conceal or cover her smile in front of him in public.

She grabs and holds (whatever she finds suitable) in front of her mouth. She bites her lips, bites fingers or presses lips on each other tightly. She looks down to break an eye contact with him.

Forward Pusher: If a man approaches and starts talking with her while she's sitting or standing, she leans forward and toward him. She shows an active interest in listening to him, reciprocating and sharing things. She lowers her gaze and smile benevolently.

She would keep her belongings close to or in front of him as if she feels safe and confident in or due to his presence. She starts closing the distance.

Attention Attractor: An elongated eye contact can drive the man crazy and make him spin on his toes. When his looks at her, she tries to draw his attention at her eyes and lips (with lipstick applied to them). She would run her tongue on her lips. She touches her face near the eyebrows, her chicks and fixes gaze on him with faint smile on face.

She would (constantly, extensively and intensively) maintain her visual attention by on him by hovering her eyes all over his face to check his responses, reactions and expressions.

Baby Cuddler: If she's in front of or around her man, she would grab and bring his attention towards babies by talking about them and/or bringing up topics related with them. By doing so, she would check his reactions to check his interest, affection and protective feeling towards babies and children.

If she can find a baby close to her, she should pick it, play with it, embrace it, kiss it, run fingers in its hair, pamper it and cuddle it. She would try to bring his attention towards the baby. She would look at the baby and then at her man with a faint smile on her face.

By the way, if a woman shows a great amount of interest in a man with only physical, economical, strategic, political and materialistic (short-term) goals and ambitions in her mind then she would send nonverbal clues to arouse and allure him (sexually) to walk in her trap. Her nonverbal behavior, expressions, displays and signals would be purely attention seeking, targeted, inviting, orchestrated, up close, impatient, seductive, imposing, intimate and revealing.

While observing mentioned nonverbal patterns, please ensure that many of them prevail frequently, together or one-after-another during interactions over a considerable period of time. Otherwise, mere attraction or 'fishing' would be mistaken as courtship.

Don't forget to read about the remaining ones in next article - Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 2).

Related Articles:
1) Man’s Courtship Body Language 2) Primary Attraction 3) Courtship and Dance 4) Woman are body language experts 5) Why we smile? 6) Why we wave hands at others? 7) Importance of eyes in relationship 8) Smell of Love 9) What we seek in partner? 10) Why women apply makeup on face? 11) The ways woman provokes her man to be protective 12) The Look of Love? 13) Couple in trouble?

April 10, 2011

Man’s Courtship Body Language

If someone want to describe men’s courtship moves in limited words then those words are “apparent, aggressive, risky and tactless”. Largely, men’s courtship cannot be described well apart of these words. The very strong reason behind the same is the hormone that makes men (to appear) more open, clear, loud, obvious and straightforward - Testosterone.

Testosterone makes men (physically) aggressive, competitive and protective. It is the hormone that secretes in a large amount in grown-up men's body, 20 times more than that of women. (According to some studies, level of testosterone skyrockets in women many times in bursts throughout a month, as compared to steady secretion of the same in men.)

Photo credit: Christopher Philip; BodyLanguageProject.com

Man makes courtship moves overtly which are easily detectable, crystal clear, vigorous and louder. Most of the moves are strongly related to showing off his masculinity, physical prowess and social status. His moves also include warning other men, keeping them away from competition and urge of acceptance by the woman of his interest.

Most men's needs from women are very few and limited but most women's expectations from men are many and diverse. That's why most clueless men feel very troubled, puzzled, confused, frustrated, sad and depressed about women's preferences, orientations, biases and choices while choosing a male partner for a long haul.

According to most of the men, most of the women get attracted towards men's higher social status, possessions, position, money, affordability, muscularity, physical power and protective capabilities only so most men flaunt, exhibit, talk about and show them off.

Anxiety of not being accepted by the woman and getting ridiculed by others for the same lingers into his mind. Rejection, embarrassment and abandoning by a woman is very hard to face, accept and overcome by most of the men.


Following are a few of the man's courtship patterns and moves, which short and catchy titles, that are very common:

Target Tracker: Compared to woman’s short darting glances, man looks directly at woman he likes or feels more attractive. In social situations, most women find this kind of look very offensive and might retaliate it with obscure temper. He would smile subtly as regular interactions start taking place and his attraction soars.

He would exploit every opportunity of looking directly at her or he would discover different opportunities by spending time, employing rapport, money, and energy or even taking unimaginable risks.

Good Looker: He starts moving fingers through his hair to straight them even if they are not messed or combs them often. He starts clearing actual or imaginary dust fallen on his cloths, adjusting his necktie to make it look neat, pull his shirt towards abdomen to fade away wrinkles, and stretch handcuffs.

He would stand straight, pull his belly inside, appear self-controlling and walk more carefully. He would try to exhibit that he follows and has good manners, habits and etiquette.

Impulse Soother: He crosses his arms over his chest while standing, seating or walking with women he likes. He unconsciously tries to control and soothe the pulsating pull towards her. He nervously looks at her, looks downwards, looks away and smiles faintly.

He might not maintain a direct eye contact with her while standing closer to her. When he talks with her, he would put a smile on his face.

Impression Maker: He puts his palms in pockets of trouser or jacket while interacting with her for most of the time. His gestures become more out of control and erratic as if he is trying to vent off his anxiety of not being much impressive in her eyes.

He might stumble upon words and breath rapidly. His heart might start pounding and blood pressure might rise. He might sweat a little and (try to) wipe it away.

Forward Mover: He starts pointing by one of his legs in the direction she is standing or sitting at the moment. He unconsciously starts advancing towards her in public or private. It’s a solid sign of showing off his desire to go ahead with a relationship with the woman.

He would capitalized every opportunity to get closer and enter into her personal zone for chatting or discussing about something.

Huge Protector: He rests his (both) hands on his hips to pretend enlarged body than the actual. This is typical posture he adapts to assure woman that he is able to cover and protect her. Hair on the back of his neck would rise like the mane of a lion.

Hands on hips is a warning signal of staying away from her too. He darts at other men while putting hands on hips or fixates his gaze on his actual rival.

Muscle Mover: He flaunts his muscular built in front of the woman whenever he gets an opportunity, mostly in private. He would wear tighter clothes, t-shirts or tank tops so that his strong muscular arms and puffed chest can be easily watched by her.

He would (attempt to) lift, drag or handle heavier objects or entwine fingers of both hands and thrust hands forward and away from torso. He would wrestle or tussle with other men or sporty hit them. He would look at his torso at one moment and look at her at next frequently.

Daunting Dominator: He starts to dominate his male friends, sub-ordinates or colleges in front of her. He would make joke or fun of them as he gets opportunity or finds their flaws. He would pat on or stand behind their back, rest his hands on their shoulders or put his entire body weight on them.

He starts questioning about them and their abilities even if it sounds illogical, irritating, untimely, offensive and unnecessary. He would blow horn by his own about his own physical, intellectual, technical, artistic and social skills, expertise and achievements.

Nice Nurturer: On the other hand, he would remain very polite, gentle and protective towards her. He would appreciate her look and clothing. He would ask her if somebody and something is causing problem, trouble and nuisance for her. He would offer her costly (surprise) gifts and ask her for having ride, drink or food together.

Also, he would actively share his possessions, goals and ambitions with her as if both of them would get benefited from them. He would ask her about her own feelings and opinions about the same too.

Status Swagger: He proudly flaunts his (latest) accomplishments and achievements by announcing, exhibiting, displaying or showing them off publicly (and without thanking anybody about the same genuinely). He would assert his capabilities, competitiveness, victories, successes, socio-economical status and possessions if any (without giving the due credits to anybody despite of facts).

Like kings or emperors, he would ask or order somebody to describe him in better words (so that others could appreciate him). He would confidently parade with trophies, badges, medals, gadgets or devices held in his hands or put on body.

Possessive Poser: When he finds or assumes that other man is showing an active interest in the same woman he likes, he would become aggressive and start openly exhibiting his possessiveness towards her. He stands putting his one or both hands on his hips and one of his legs pointing towards her.

By the way, the man frequently adapting this posture in front of her in public or private can have (sexually) jealous, aggressive, controlling and dominative feelings and intentions towards her.

Rival Hunter: He glares at other men interacting with or approaching her. He hurriedly rushes to her and tries to derogate other men by verbal, muscular abilities. He tries to separate her from other men or draws her attention at himself deliberately.

He would try to embarrass, insult, irritate, derogate, man handle and drive away other men in illogical, irritating, aggressive, offensive, harmful or arrogant ways.

Glancing Dancer: He would dance in front of her or at place that is easily observable by her. Rather than performing solitary, he would compete with other men with his stamina and different kind of moves. Like showing off his muscular power, he would look at himself and look at her in repetition.

He would amplify his tempo, try unusual/risky movements or exaggerate his movements if she’s watching him with interest.

Rough Rider: He would show, exhibit and put on display his horse, bike and car or a whole collection of same to her. He would purposefully manage to draw her attention to his bike riding and car driving skills, stunts, long journeys, adventures and achievements. He would show some risky riding and driving moves with expectations of her admiration.

He would approach her on a bike or in a car and would ask her if she needs to reach somewhere. He would tell her that he would drop her at the destination very quickly. He would openly or indirectly ask or suggest her for accompanying him all alone on a long ride, away from people and crowd.

By the way, if a man shows a great amount of interest in a woman with only physical (short-term) goals and ambitions in his mind then he would send nonverbal clues to arouse and allure her (sexually) to walk in his trap. His nonverbal behavior, expressions, displays and signals would be purely attention seeking, targeted, inviting, orchestrated, up close, impatient, imposing, intimate and revealing.

While observing mentioned nonverbal patterns, please ensure that many of them prevail frequently, together or one-after-another during interactions over a considerable period of time. Otherwise, mere attraction or 'fishing' would be mistaken as courtship.

Related Articles:
1) Domination 2) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 1) 3) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 2) 4) Primary Attraction 5) Human Courtship and Dance 6) Why we smile? 7) Social Class 8) Importance of Eyes 9) Smell of Love 10) What we seek in partner? 11) The ways woman provokes her man to be protective 12 The Look of Love? 13) Couple in trouble?

April 06, 2011

Primary Attraction

When it comes to courtship, attraction is the point from where it all kick-starts and firing up. Getting attracted towards member of the opposite gender means unconsciously or involuntarily noticing and paying extra/special attention to physical, aesthetic and personality attributes with pleasure and spontaneity. Getting attracted to an individual is inviting the same individuals attention too. It’s way of making others to re-direct their attention towards ourselves.

Eyes speak volume in attraction.

When we find something interesting and attention worthy, our facial framework goes through dramatic makeover in no time. Facial muscles get stretched to remove wrinkles, eyebrows are slightly raised, eyelids are considerably lifted and a faint smile lingers on face. Off course, attraction has most to do with eyes since they receive all visual clues and express interest.

If what we are looking are at is more appealing then our pupils get dilated enormously within milliseconds and stay so for 2-3 seconds. It’s most powerful precursor to attraction. That's why looking or making others to look into eyes is the crux of courtship.

Moreover, our torso starts pointing towards the person we feel attractive. We turn our face towards it. If we wear glasses, we slightly adjust them. We capitalize every opportunity to look at the person. We appear more attentive, eager and open for listening the person.

Attracting someone's attention has to do with looking differently than others because its hardwired in our brains to pay attention to things which appear different than that are typical or what we routinely observe. Primary attraction is mostly subjected to appearance, looks and aesthetics. It the very first step of courtship.

Related Articles:
1) Why we smile? 2) Woman’s Courtship Body Language (Part 1) 3) Woman’s Courtship Body Language (Part 2) 4) Man’s Courtship Body Language 5) Courtship and Dance 6) Importance of eyes in relationship 7) Body Language with Poor Body Image 8) Smell of love 9) Face to Face 10) Like attracts like 11) Secondary Attraction 12) What we seek in partner? 13) Why women apply makeup on face? 14) Know Who is Attracted to You

April 01, 2011

Courtship and Dance

Search for a suitable mate has brought surprising and dramatic transformations in us since millions of years and they would continue to happen in the future. Each gender has kept itself changing, enhancing, adjusting or modifying to become more and more suitable for opposite gender, Diversified geographical, climatic, resource and ecological conditions as well as socio-economical norms, pressures and demands have led to various mental, social and intellectual adaptations.

Although being technologically advances and geographically diversified, we are biological creatures. We apply some distinct selection criterion with a few fundamental filters that we commonly share with all other creatures. Biologically, men look for physical beauty, fertility, attractiveness, youth, cheerfulness and nurturing capabilities in women. Socially, women look for resourcefulness, courage, competitiveness, physical power, protective capabilities and economical stability in men. Women's preferences and expectations might be much higher than men.

Birds in courtship
Each gender has put a constant pressure of desirability on another. Only those who successfully adapted to the pressure and changed themselves accordingly have passed their genes to the next generation(s). We are the biological product of the same long running and demanding process. It's called as Sexual or Mate Selection, which was Sir Charles Darwin's alternative theory of Evolution.

Due to the constant pressure, males have principally evolved with qualities like pursuing, running, analyzing, planning, searching, navigating, hunting, protecting, cultivating, crafting, fighting, competing, using weapons and making tools whereas females have evolved with qualities like nurturing, care taking, harvesting, preserving, collecting social cues, scrutinizing, managing people and conflict solving that directly complements with male qualities.

Additionally, both genders seek fertility, fitness, health and favorable mindset in each other. Even in modern world, we hardly could hold back ourselves from finding the same qualities in potential partner(s) since they have helped us in surviving over the millions of years. Modern lifestyle, tools, transport, comfort, luxury, medical intervention, economy and easily availability of resources are quite recent achievements.

An elderly couple in Courtship from Papua New Guinea

While courting or soliciting a member of the opposite gender, each of us tries to highlight the same qualities, flaunts, accentuate them, exhibits and draws attention towards them. Like studying other kinds of nonverbal behavior, clues, signals, expressions and displays; different patterns through which males and females (try to) draw attention, attract each other, send clues and exhibit things is really fascinating and interesting.

Studying human courtship is really interesting and pleasing. Unlike other nonverbal displays, clues, signals and expressions; human courtship is very dramatic, poetic, colorful, vivid and sparkling because it holds some definite promises for both individuals. However, the most wonderful aspect of same is that we behave, accentuate, exhibit, display and show off somewhat similarly the way others creatures do during their courtship and breeding seasons.

In courtship, which is quite an elaborate, step-by-step and also a long running process, both male and female have different strategies to attract, bond with and retain a partner. Courtship is the process which continues even after establishment of firm bond between the two partners e. g. post-marital and post-childbirth recognition, assertion and confirmation of (sexual) attraction, affection and bonding.

A man tries to accentuate, emphasize, exhibit and show off his physical capabilities, confidence, courage, physical fitness, dominance, protective power, socio-economical status, aspirations, intelligence, achievements and goals. On the other hand, a woman tries to accentuate, emphasize, exhibit and show off her youth, beauty, sensitively, fertility, vulnerability, sensuality, gentleness, cheerfulness, joyfulness, funny side, lightheartedness, exuberance, adaptability, caring nature and nurturing capabilities.

While most men's preferences and needs have hardly changed over centuries, most women's preferences and expectations have greatly changed and are changing dramatically with the changing world. In the modern, liberal, civilized and industrialized world in which women get educated, money and drive cars on their own; women get attracted towards, impressed by, get weak in their knees over and prefer men with diverse expertise, qualities, abilities, aptitudes, competencies, capabilities, calibers, powers, skills, talents, strengths, prospects, potentials, goals, ambitions, achievements etc.

They include optimism, energy, ingenuity, creativity, sensitivity, positivity, integrity, sensuality, spontaneity, generosity, credibility, dependability, adaptability, good habits, discipline, physical fitness, aesthetic endowments, athletic abilities, sportive nature, social rapport, intellectual reasoning, organizational vision, tactical competitiveness, strategic strength, technical aptitude, scientific knowledge, poetic expression, artistic achievements, culinary skills, comic sense, verbal fluency, oratory talent, nurturing nature etc.

Generally, during initial stages of human courtship, a man makes straightforward advances, spends money, belittles other men, tries to run them away, competes with them and risks himself physically whereas a woman remains choosy, reserved, suggesting, evaluating, encouraging, examining and investigating. However, some of the mentioned strategies can also be switched between and/or shared by both men and women.

If both parties (a man and a woman) arrive at the level of fondness for each other after some initial interactions, they engage themselves in scrutinizing each other. After finding other party fit for a long term relationship, they spend time together in submission, synchrony and solitude. Nonverbal communication plays a crucial role in deciding the course, direction and future a potential romantic relationship between both parties.


In human world, dancing has been accepted, incorporated, ritualized and standardized as a way to celebrate, enjoy and express happiness. Basically, in the world of creatures, dancing evolved as a way to demonstrate physical fitness, motor skills, lightheartedness, creativity and fertile potentials. In combination, each footstep, bend, spin, tug, tap, turn, toss, gesture, posture and body movement convey and express different meanings and messages.

Achieving accurate and dynamic coordination among each moving body part requires a lot of energy, adaptability, elasticity, balance, motor control and spatial (height, width, length, and breadth) awareness. They directly correlate with physical fitness, endurance and brain’s motor control (movement and synchronization) capabilities. A certain type of dance movements, moves and steps are sexually suggestive, appealing, alluring and flirtatious.

Dancing is a partner attracting strategy.

Both men and women have inherited the ability of dancing but sometimes systematic training is also required. Elder men and women teaching dance steps to young members and candidates is an integral part of tribal and civilized societies. In animal world, both males and females start dancing and singing during breeding season to attract partners.

Sociologists, biologists, zoologists, courtship experts and body language experts notice, observe, document and analyze biological, physical, emotional and intellectual expressions, clues, signals, displays and tells of both male and female and try to decode the strategic, tactical, genetic, biological and evolutionary goals behind each of them.

By most, it's the women who suggest, smile, giggle, laugh, shy, bend, twist and adorn themselves a lot and it's the men who stand and/or remain protective, strong, caring, courageous, generous, expending, resourcing, risking and resourceful by them during the initial stages of courtship. Both maintain hygienic and good looks.

Related Articles:
1) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 1) 2) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 2) 3) Man's Courtship Body Language 4) Primary Attraction 5) Smell of love 6) Social Class 7) Proxemics 8) Secondary Attraction 9) What we seek in partner? 0) Why women apply makeup on face? 11) Indian Classical Dances 12) The ways woman provokes her man to be protective 13) Know Who is Attracted to You 14) Couple in trouble?