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April 01, 2011

Courtship and Dance

Search for a suitable mate has brought surprising and dramatic transformations in us since millions of years and they would continue to happen in the future. Each gender has kept itself changing, enhancing, adjusting or modifying to become more and more suitable for opposite gender, Diversified geographical, climatic, resource and ecological conditions as well as socio-economical norms, pressures and demands have led to various mental, social and intellectual adaptations.

Although being technologically advances and geographically diversified, we are biological creatures. We apply some distinct selection criterion with a few fundamental filters that we commonly share with all other creatures. Biologically, men look for physical beauty, fertility, attractiveness, youth, cheerfulness and nurturing capabilities in women. Socially, women look for resourcefulness, courage, competitiveness, physical power, protective capabilities and economical stability in men. Women's preferences and expectations might be much higher than men.

Birds in courtship
Each gender has put a constant pressure of desirability on another. Only those who successfully adapted to the pressure and changed themselves accordingly have passed their genes to the next generation(s). We are the biological product of the same long running and demanding process. It's called as Sexual or Mate Selection, which was Sir Charles Darwin's alternative theory of Evolution.

Due to the constant pressure, males have principally evolved with qualities like pursuing, running, analyzing, planning, searching, navigating, hunting, protecting, cultivating, crafting, fighting, competing, using weapons and making tools whereas females have evolved with qualities like nurturing, care taking, harvesting, preserving, collecting social cues, scrutinizing, managing people and conflict solving that directly complements with male qualities.

Additionally, both genders seek fertility, fitness, health and favorable mindset in each other. Even in modern world, we hardly could hold back ourselves from finding the same qualities in potential partner(s) since they have helped us in surviving over the millions of years. Modern lifestyle, tools, transport, comfort, luxury, medical intervention, economy and easily availability of resources are quite recent achievements.

An elderly couple in Courtship from Papua New Guinea

While courting or soliciting a member of the opposite gender, each of us tries to highlight the same qualities, flaunts, accentuate them, exhibits and draws attention towards them. Like studying other kinds of nonverbal behavior, clues, signals, expressions and displays; different patterns through which males and females (try to) draw attention, attract each other, send clues and exhibit things is really fascinating and interesting.

Studying human courtship is really interesting and pleasing. Unlike other nonverbal displays, clues, signals and expressions; human courtship is very dramatic, poetic, colorful, vivid and sparkling because it holds some definite promises for both individuals. However, the most wonderful aspect of same is that we behave, accentuate, exhibit, display and show off somewhat similarly the way others creatures do during their courtship and breeding seasons.

In courtship, which is quite an elaborate, step-by-step and also a long running process, both male and female have different strategies to attract, bond with and retain a partner. Courtship is the process which continues even after establishment of firm bond between the two partners e. g. post-marital and post-childbirth recognition, assertion and confirmation of (sexual) attraction, affection and bonding.

A man tries to accentuate, emphasize, exhibit and show off his physical capabilities, confidence, courage, physical fitness, dominance, protective power, socio-economical status, aspirations, intelligence, achievements and goals. On the other hand, a woman tries to accentuate, emphasize, exhibit and show off her youth, beauty, sensitively, fertility, vulnerability, sensuality, gentleness, cheerfulness, joyfulness, funny side, lightheartedness, exuberance, adaptability, caring nature and nurturing capabilities.

While most men's preferences and needs have hardly changed over centuries, most women's preferences and expectations have greatly changed and are changing dramatically with the changing world. In the modern, liberal, civilized and industrialized world in which women get educated, money and drive cars on their own; women get attracted towards, impressed by, get weak in their knees over and prefer men with diverse expertise, qualities, abilities, aptitudes, competencies, capabilities, calibers, powers, skills, talents, strengths, prospects, potentials, goals, ambitions, achievements etc.

They include optimism, energy, ingenuity, creativity, sensitivity, positivity, integrity, sensuality, spontaneity, generosity, credibility, dependability, adaptability, good habits, discipline, physical fitness, aesthetic endowments, athletic abilities, sportive nature, social rapport, intellectual reasoning, organizational vision, tactical competitiveness, strategic strength, technical aptitude, scientific knowledge, poetic expression, artistic achievements, culinary skills, comic sense, verbal fluency, oratory talent, nurturing nature etc.

Generally, during initial stages of human courtship, a man makes straightforward advances, spends money, belittles other men, tries to run them away, competes with them and risks himself physically whereas a woman remains choosy, reserved, suggesting, evaluating, encouraging, examining and investigating. However, some of the mentioned strategies can also be switched between and/or shared by both men and women.

If both parties (a man and a woman) arrive at the level of fondness for each other after some initial interactions, they engage themselves in scrutinizing each other. After finding other party fit for a long term relationship, they spend time together in submission, synchrony and solitude. Nonverbal communication plays a crucial role in deciding the course, direction and future a potential romantic relationship between both parties.

In human world, dancing has been accepted, incorporated, ritualized and standardized as a way to celebrate, enjoy and express happiness. Basically, in the world of creatures, dancing evolved as a way to demonstrate physical fitness, motor skills, lightheartedness, creativity and fertile potentials. In combination, each footstep, bend, spin, tug, tap, turn, toss, gesture, posture and body movement convey and express different meanings and messages.

Achieving accurate and dynamic coordination among each moving body part requires a lot of energy, adaptability, elasticity, balance, motor control and spatial (height, width, length, and breadth) awareness. They directly correlate with physical fitness, endurance and brain’s motor control (movement and synchronization) capabilities. A certain type of dance movements, moves and steps are sexually suggestive, appealing, alluring and flirtatious.

Dancing is a partner attracting strategy.

Both men and women have inherited the ability of dancing but sometimes systematic training is also required. Elder men and women teaching dance steps to young members and candidates is an integral part of tribal and civilized societies. In animal world, both males and females start dancing and singing during breeding season to attract partners.

Sociologists, biologists, zoologists, courtship experts and body language experts notice, observe, document and analyze biological, physical, emotional and intellectual expressions, clues, signals, displays and tells of both male and female and try to decode the strategic, tactical, genetic, biological and evolutionary goals behind each of them.

By most, it's the women who suggest, smile, giggle, laugh, shy, bend, twist and adorn themselves a lot and it's the men who stand and/or remain protective, strong, caring, courageous, generous, expending, resourcing, risking and resourceful by them during the initial stages of courtship. Both maintain hygienic and good looks.

Related Articles:
1) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 1) 2) Woman's Courtship Body Language (Part 2) 3) Man's Courtship Body Language 4) Primary Attraction 5) Smell of love 6) Social Class 7) Proxemics 8) Secondary Attraction 9) What we seek in partner? 0) Why women apply makeup on face? 11) Indian Classical Dances 12) The ways woman provokes her man to be protective 13) Know Who is Attracted to You 14) Couple in trouble?

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